Another edition of hilarity

It's hard to say the Onion's better since the takeover by Yu Wan Mei, as it's always been top-notch, but now it at least gives this blog an excuse to link to its articles.

This one, for instance: Yao Ming!

Yao Ming officially averages 84 points per basketball game and has a shooting percentage of .9999998, Chinese basketball officials said. Furthermore, Yao Ming is perfectly healthy and, in fact, cannot be injured. Yao Ming is also a universally acknowledged beacon of humility and respect, and on the exceedingly rare occasion when he does miss a shot, he no doubt does so on purpose, selflessly ensuring that his lesser American teammates feel better about their own lackluster shooting percentages.